Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Speeding...?

A police officer flags down a car for speeding.
This conversation followed with the driver…
Officer: May I see your driver’s license sir?
Driver: I’d let you- if I had one. It was suspended when I got my 8th DUI.
Officer: uh ok.. May I see the insurance for this vehicle?
Driver: Umm it’s not my car. I just stole it from a Wal-Mart.
Officer: You stole it??
Driver: That’s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the insurance in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there!
Officer: There’s a gun in the glove box?!
Driver: Yes sirr. That’s where I put it after i shot and killed the woman at the Wal-Mart and stuffed her in the trunk.
Officer: There’s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Of course, sir!
(Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation):
Captain: Sir, may I see your license?
Driver: Sure thing officer! Here it is.
(It was valid)
Captain: Whose car is this?
Driver: It’s mine, officer. Here’s the insurance and owners card.
(The driver owned the car)
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there’s a gun in it?
Driver: A gun?? Yes, sir, I will open it, but i assure you there’s no gun!
(Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.)
Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there’s a body in it.
Driver: WHAT!?  Here look for yourself sir!
(Trunk is opened; no body)
Captain: I don’t understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn’t have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk!
Driver: Really?!?!? Ain’t that something?! And I’ll bet that lying sucker told you I was speeding, too huh!!


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